Why WHy WHY!!!!

You ladies just don't get it. It was 5:30 this morning and I had just achieved a feat so perfect, so destined for enjoyment, it was doomed with failure.
Guys, here is the scenario, I had tried all night to achieve that perfect position in bed. Pillow top mattress was adjusted to my body just perfect. I was not to hot and not to cold either. I was laying face down and out cold.
My wife says "Jay it's 5:30 time to get up." FUCK! No screw it I am going to lay here a bit longer. 15 minutes pass and my wife comes back to the bed room: "It's 5:45 get up!" "No" I say, "I have achieved Nirvana, plus I no longer have morning wood so I can actually lay like this comfortably! Leave me alone!"